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I am a crazed sports nut. I have the TV on to ESPN just for calming background noise. I still do this thing that I've done since I was a kid , where I phantom swing or pitch for no reason. It's just who I am.
So I still have plans to visit every ball park. I've been to AT&T in San Francisco, Oakland Coliseum in Oakland, the original Yankee Stadium in New York, Chase Field in Arizona, Angel Sradium in Aneheim, Jack Murphy in San Diego. That's it. I've got a long way to go. I've also never seen a live, regular season football game. I think I want to see the 49ers before they leave Candlestick. Yes. That's for sure. I guess that's and I have to see the Black Hole too. I can be a Raiders fan for a day. Lord, forgive me!
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I've sat on this question for a few weeks. Not that I couldn't answer it. Not for lack of reason. Not because I have no direction.
I'm going for it. In a conversation I once had with her, I explained to my wife that, while she needs her friends, I needed my art. I balanced her want to go out with my want to stay home alone. Well, now I've got what I wanted. And I'm taking advantage of the opportunity. In these last few weeks, I have spent every lonely minute surrounded by my vision, my paints, my ideas, my frustration, and my joy. I am working uninhibited in my process and technique, while being open to exploration of how I'm using my life events to speak through me. When I'm not with my children, who are my physical representations of my peace, I am able to converse with my art, my mental friend, into the late of the night And even until the early morning hours. I dreamed of being able to manipulate and create the Illusion of Life...check. I dreamed of meeting other artists, who would have the insight to expand my perspective...check. I dreamed of having shows, where I could showcase my pieces and broaden my audience...check. I dreamed of having $$$ In my pocket, earned by my labor of love...check. I will not be a starving artist because God is supporting my dream by bringing opportunity to my doorsteps. In my previous post, I talked about meeting someone. Now I've met a few others. And I know there will be more. This is not coincidence. His Hand is upon me, and only He could line these people up at the right time, at the right place, to make this possible. As I now am developing the financial means to support my dream, I now say my reality. Thank you Lord for providing this passion, this equalizer, that gives me life in my life. I dream big, so I must live big. Shake off the small stuff, put it under my feet, and breath in what God has promised me! Before you read, this is not a love story.
Recently I met someone. Some would say it was chance. Others might say I'm lucky. But I know the real truth. I am blessed. I was walking through a shopping center, looking for a locksmith. As I was walking mindlessly, a door opens and out pops a woman I have not seen in sometime. She is opening her new business and invites me in for a few moments. Staying true to my person, I smile and promise to return after I've completed my current task. Now with lock I hand I proceed to to go back. We spark up the casual catch up conversation. Then I start to see how God has intervened. What did He have to do to get that door to open at that moment? 10 seconds slower or faster and we miss each other. Why on that day, at this time? The last few weeks have seen some titanic shifts in life direction. I am excited to just walk through, with my joy, with a new vision for how life can be. Thank you Lord for putting the right people, in the right place, at Your time. I have this idea that one day I will live by the 20-80 rule. I'd like to maintain a lifestyle that allows me to thrive on 20% while giving and sharing 80.
Joel Osteen, whom I listen to through his podcast and broadcast on occasion, recently talked about a shift is coming. That those who were in the back, by divine intervention will be in the front. That our Lord will meet our needs and move us to a better position in life. I take that as a call to prepare for a rainfall of blessing that I can use and distribute to others in His name. I heard about two me who prayed for rain. But one took the next step and bought a raincoat, and an umbrella. It is my time to already start thanking God for what is coming my way. I'm visionary enough to see that God will provide for my family's needs, so I have to initiate actions that will properly use my abundance of grace. I have crwative vision through the art, the digital skills to compete in this online world, I have good personal communication with clients, but above all I am able to share and honor my faith. I dream big because God plans bigger. Funny. I think you would like me just to shut up.
It's not easy trying to express myself in a way that is not awkward. But this is a conversation of one, so the whole concept is ridiculous. It may be insane, but for me and my movement forward in life, it must be done. I will encourage you to continue pursuing every opportunity to be the woman I've always known you to be. I want to see you follow through with whatever pursuits God leads you to. Travel , eat well, laugh a lot. I want to listen to you. I shall have no need to argue or criticize. Tell a story or two, or in time, express how you feel in a safe conversation, maybe over coffee at Tillys. Someday in the future, I will stop because there is nothing more to be said. Until that day, this conversation of one will continue to inspire my spirits, my life vision, and my heart. |